This is Tip #2 in a series of 10 relationship building reminders.
Tip #1 reminded us of the importance of your facial expressions. Today I will touch on “eye-contact.”
This non-verbal behavioral tip happens to be one of my pet peeves. It sounds so obviously simple, and virtually everybody feels they are good at it. News Flash! They are not. In fact, most people are very poor at it. This probably includes you.
There is an old golf teaching reminder that states: what you feel is not necessarily what is real. Using golf as an example, the amateur golfer thinks they are swinging the club in a slow, rhythmic, well-positioned and consistent fashion. It usually takes a video replay to show the student that their swing is anything but exemplary. The videotape will show you the errors of your ways.
In business, looking at people in the eye is of paramount importance, yet it is a rarely exercised skill. I don’t expect you to take my word for this since you probably are already positioning yourself as the exception. Chances are, you are not.
You may not seal the deal by looking people in the eye, but you will appear more confident once you physically indicate that you are interested in who you are speaking with. There is no better way at accomplishing this than to look at the people you are speaking with.
Of particular interest is the fact that a lack of eye contact, or eye-dart portrays a lock of confidence and gives a visual cue clearly resulting in a lack of trust.
No eye contact, no trust. No trust, no business.
The question I ask myself regularly is why do so many people find it difficult to look others in the eye? You are a good, honest, hard-working and caring person. Why in the world would you purposely lead others to question your sincerity? This is just as painful as shooting yourself in the foot, something I bet you would not choose to do given another option.
Looking people in the eye is your other option. Believe me when I tell you, more good things will result from this non-verbal behavior.
Mike Marchev is recognized for his down-to-earth, street-savvy and honest delivery of useful sales and marketing advice, suggestions, tactics and strategies. For a complimentary copy of his Special Report titled: 11 Sales Mistakes You Must Avoid send Mike an email with the word TRO-11 in the Subject Box. firstname.lastname@example.org
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