This is Tip #5 in a series of 10 relationship building reminders.
Today signals the halfway point in our ten-part non-verbal tips review. This may sound like a bizarre topic, but today I am going to introduce you to the “limp-leg trick.” Pay attention.
Here is the deal. Most people (spelled m-o-s-t) are very poor communicators. They may be “okay” at sharing their thoughts when it is their turn to talk, but when these very same people are not talking, they are biding their time waiting for their turn to talk.
In other words, they are very poor at the skill of listening. Why they are so poor is because they spend very little time practicing this skill. They just wait patiently for a pause in the conversation so they can jump in with their earth-shaking news of the day. They may even fool themselves into thinking that somebody (anybody) is actually interested in their opinions.
The truth is that when they are “waiting”, their total lack of interest becomes crystal clear to the speaker. We know when we have lost you, and you are not enhancing your likeabilty-factor once this happens.
But you can be sure of this: If I detect that you actually are listening to me, then our relationship will be nothing but improved. After all, people do like people who like them, or are interested in what we say.
So, what is today’s tip? It is all about the “limp-leg” trick. I gave it that name, so don’t for a minute think I am quoting some smart philosopher from the 18th century. Here is how it works.
Your objective is to focus on what the other person is saying without interruption. You want them to know that you are listening to every word. You do this by stopping them along the way to ask them for (a)clarification, (b) additional supportive information, or (c) to repeat their last point since you were momentarily distracted.
This clearly is an indication that they have your attention. Even when you are hanging on their every word, you might want to try the ole “limp-leg” to simply impress upon them that you are with them.
Without interrupting, you can also demonstrate your interest in what people have to say by vocalizing agreement and support by making statements such as, hmmm, yes, interesting, really, or nice as a way of communicating your attentiveness in what they have to say or share.
If you are like most people, you will be waiting your turn to wax eloquent. Fight this tendency. Try exercising the limp-leg trick. You will see instantly that your reputation will be enhanced based on your genuine interest in others.
Mike Marchev is recognized for his down-to-earth, street-savvy and honest delivery of useful sales and marketing advice, suggestions, tactics and strategies. For a complimentary copy of his Special Report titled: 11 Sales Mistakes You Must Avoid send Mike an email with the word TRO-11 in the Subject Box. firstname.lastname@example.org
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